Moar Filler

Holy Balls, it's been a while since I've posted!  I didn't realize...hafta get on a schedule...

Anyway, more later on my first, well, lots of stuff.

Have I mentioned lately that I love my job?

Filler

After a very eventful weekend and a rather quiet "weekend" (my weekend is Sunday and Monday), I'm rather bored.  Today I finished two books, got a readers' advisory posted, put on real pants, debated whether to buy or rent, updated my reading list, stretched out my poor back, did an epic load of crunches, put a bunch of books on hold at the library, and didn't do the one thing I planned on doing today (folding the whole half-basket of laundry).  Well and thoroughly bored.  Thank goodness I work tomorrow.

Did I mention that I recently (finally) read Room and have done a readers' advisory?  (Criticism welcome as it hones my rusty skills.)

Back to Work (the Future?)

First off, Windows Starter with Windows Whatever The F* It Is Now is friggin’ annoying.  I can’t program it to start with either single or double spacing (as opposed to 1.15 spacing with 10 pt. whatever) in 12 pt. Times New Roman (AS IS NORMAL) instead of 11pt. Calibri, a font of which I’ve never even heard.

So, today was the First Day Back from the three weeks of “basic training” at the Central Office.  Basic was not…quite…as basic as I’d hoped.  Simultaneously as boring as I feared and more entertaining than I’d hoped.  Hey man, I learned how to cuff people two different ways AND use pepper spray…neither of which I will ever use.  But hey, if I’m not learning how to use the radio I’m forced to take with me every day, why not be forced to learn defensive tactics when I’m not allowed to carry cuffs or pepper spray?

Anyway, First Day Back was more about answering my email and stopping my head from spinning around in that Exorcist minus the pea green vomit way.  (Same facial expressions applied, believe me.)  First it was all OMG Drowning in Emailz.  Then it was OMFG Drowning in Paper Mailz for Too Long.  Oh, and did I mention that I have a Book Order due yesterday?  (NB: As of posting, possibly 2 or 3 days ago.)  I checked.  All other institutions had between 170 and 200 books on their lists.  I currently have 10.  I’ve tried. Future Librarians Listen to Me, learning, knowing, and being intimately involved with your collections takes time, effort, love, and ever more time and effort.  And possibly love.  And maybe some passion.  I have all of the above, but right now I’m more concerned with getting copy paper and library cards, and if I have time, some correction ribbon for the typewriters. 

Honestly, today I spent most of my time typing up purchase requests so that I could spend the sweet dolla dolla bills that have been approved in my budget.  Because I need barcode scanners and mazagines and newspapers I will never read…BUT MY PATRONS WILL.

And in the end, that’s all that matters...

Until I tell them they only have hand-me-down romance novels from the women’s institution to read for the next 3 months.

(I don’t think they’ll complain.  I’ve skimmed them all…they’re, uh, not bad.)  ;-)

Oh, and don't hold this against me, but I have two more Readers' Advisory to do, for one of which I've lost my notes and just returned to the library, and the other I haven't written notes on yet.  And I've just started a new, critically-acclaimed book.  I'll work on this, I promise.

Top CO

Our trainer today reminds me a lot of Tom Colicchio.

Basic Training

First of all, let me tell you that I have been sitting in a McDonalds for the past two hours scamming some free internet, drinking soda, and generally looking schizophrenic to the casual observer (randomly typing and laughing while wearing headphone on).

For this Prison Librarian, there are three types of training: Library-Specific, In-House (tailored to the institution), and Basic, which every employee of the Department of Corrections must attend and which I have just completed my first two weeks out of three. 

The first week was primarily Corrections basics, mostly based on department policy, sensitivity training, and “stress management”.  Some good stuff, some really annoying stuff, but I both understand and appreciate the need for all employees to have a standard core to fall back on should something happen.  Professionalism, Code of Conduct, Mission, Values, and how the rehabilitation procedure is supposed to work…yes, all us employees should probably know this.

This second week we got into the more “in-depth” stuff.  Let me tell you, though, Constitutional Law and the rights of the offenders is not exactly the most exciting way to begin your week.  The other things, which I’ll probably never use, came later.  So, this week I learned how to cuff an offender two different ways, how much force I’m allowed to use in an emergency, how to do a frisk search, and how to proceed with a crime scene.  I’m a librarian.  I have my own CO.  Chances are I’ll never have to use any of this.  But whatever, it’s new info, so it’s interesting…and the hands-on stuff was wicked cool.  (Prison hooch?  Playing with real-live handcuffs?  Oh yes.) 

Anyway, I’ve been collecting Lessons of the Day, because the trainers say some truly wise/funny things about once a day.  Thus:

• ·         Never come to work nekkid. (It’s Mid-Missouri, what can I say?)
• ·         Never give up your snitch.
• ·         Peace and Love and Hug a Thug
• ·         Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill.

That's all for this week.  Although you never know, I might get the next What I'm Reading done this weekend!  (pfft, right.)

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